Tag: pmad
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I See You, Mama: Part Three
My first week home from the hospital, I was far too scared to stay home alone with Joshua. My church arranged for my friends to come stay with me while Paul worked. My friends packed up their littles, came to my apartment, and spent their days caring for me. Their support overwhelmed me. On the…
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I See You, Mama: Part Two
The four weeks between my first panic attack and my trip to the emergency room are quite fuzzy. My sleep was minimal due to constant intrusive thoughts. I tossed and turned through the night, unable to rest. Eating felt nearly impossible—my stomach was a constant wave of nausea. In moments of desperation, I would get…
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I See you, Mama: Part One
Friday, September 24, 2004, my husband, Paul, came home from work to find me sitting crisscross applesauce on the nursery floor. Head in my hands, I couldn’t speak. My tears fell fast and hard. My heart raced so fast, I couldn’t catch my breath. The fear reverberated through my entire body. Finally, I squeaked out,…
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